Parenting Tips...

1. Dress up as Santa and go to the mall. Wait until you have a sizeable entourage of rugrats, at which point you rip off your beard and loudly proclaim, “THERE IS NO SANTA!” Run towards the nearest exit.


2. I always wanted to download the Ice Cream truck music off the internet, and blast it as I drive down the road. Nothing like good music and the faces of disappointed children.


3. Scary as it may seem, I am now a parent myself. I can’t wait until my oldest child comes home from school to see me in the back yard filling a hole with dirt.
   ”daddy, what happened?”
   ”I bought you that puppy you always wanted, but mommy killed it”